Some questions and answers

I thought I would put together a little question/answer page of some things I have been asked when someone finds out I am going to be a surrogate. If you have any of your own questions - let me know! I would love to update the page for others who may be wondering the same thing(s)!



Why did you want to become a surrogate?
Besides the initial morning sickness in the start, I have been lucky to have had 3 easy, non-complicated pregnancies. I actually am one of those people who enjoy pregnancy (and birth!) and everything that comes with it.
I can not imagine life without my kids. It is hard to imagine the roller coaster of emotions that comes with infertility and I never have pretended I could.
So putting those together, it was an easy decision. Why not help a couple grow/create their family, when I really enjoyed the entire process of growing/creating my own?!

Is it your baby?
- No! Not at all. I am a gestational surrogate, which means the genetic materials used were of the IPs (intended parents). The IM (intended mother) had her eggs retrieved and they used the IFs (intended fathers) sperm (or donor sperm and eggs!). I am simply the "oven", if you will, for this baby. Isn't science completely awesome?!


I could never be a surrogate. I would be too sad to give it up. 
- First off, with that thinking no, you probably could not be a surrogate. I am not giving up anything, because the baby was never mine to start with! What I am giving is a family the chance to grow their family. I am reuniting the IPs with their baby when s/he is born! I can not even begin to imagine the emotions in that moment - but sad does not come to mind when I think about it!

How much do you get paid? How much to the parents pay?
- Compensation and costs vary. It depends on your agency, type of surrogacy (gestational vs traditional), if you live in a surro-friendly state (some states it is illegal to be compensated as a surrogate) and many many other factors. This process is far from inexpensive for the IPs. I will not go into a specifics here about our situation, but a quick google search can bring up a general idea and why costs might vary. If I was doing this for the money, I would not be doing it at all.

What will your kids think?
- We have had some talks with the older two. Our oldest thinks that it is really neat and asked if it was okay to call the baby her 'surrosibling'. She understands that the baby isn't related to her, like her sister and brother, and that when born the baby will go live with his/her parents. We plan on being very open with the kids and reminding them we are lucky to take really good care of the baby until s/he is ready to come earthside and meet its mommy and daddy. We hope the kids will be able to meet the baby before it heads back to its home!


Will you get pictures or see the baby after the baby goes home?
We hope to remain in contact with our IPs! That was  really important to me when going into matching that we could have a relationship of some kind after. I can not imagine connecting and going through such an emotional journey to then not speak after!

Ultrasound Results

I had my second blood draw and first ultrasound today to check my lining thickness.
I have not received the results on where my Estradiol levels are at - however my lining is measuring at 16mm! It was 7mm last month at my medical work up (they want it over 8mm). Needless to say, everyone is thrilled with the results!
Below is a random picture I grabbed while getting dressed again. Does it look like a heart to anyone else?

Funny story - my youngest two came along since I knew it would be a quick appointment and they tend to do really well while out and about (and they did - I was very proud!). My middle decided she would rather watch the ultrasound (transvaginal, by the way) than youtube kids with her brother. Right in the middle she looks at the tech and says "what are you looking at?! My mothers skull?!!!!". It might not be as funny as it was probably a "you had to be there" moment. But either way - it was neat how much she actually paid attention and how many questions she was asking! (I did answer in a simplified way for her). She was also pretty upset that they were drawing my blood for the lab workup. I had to constantly reassure her that I was okay.

Now I am on two patches every 2 days plus one prometrium tablet vaginally 3 times daily for 10 days.  Let me be honest here -  I am not looking forward to the tablet. But it is only 10 days and will fly by I am sure!

That is about it for now again!

4 + 4 = ultrasound

I removed my 3 and placed 4 more patches on today. I am waiting for the usual headache to show. I think I am almost past my neeeeeeeeeed ( <-- big need) for caffeine at this point.
But I have the 4 patches today, and Sunday I will remove these and place 4 more before my ultrasound and blood draw on Tuesday!

My little two have been awesome this week playing together, and helping out. So I decided after lunch we would make some cookies - chocolate chip was their request! Since I can not have chocolate right now, I separated a little bit of dough out and made some chipless cookies for myself! The kids and I are having a movie and cuddles night tonight since my husband will be gone - so I needed to make sure I had a small treat too! 

I will probably update next after my appointments ... fingers crossed everything looks perfect!

Patches and Pokes

Nothing too much to update. I am on week 2 of patches. Today I started wearing more than 1 at a time (today is 2, Wednesday will be 3, Friday will be 4 and Sunday 4). I had a blood draw today and will have an ultrasound and blood draw next Tuesday.
I also scheduled an acupuncture session for tomorrow evening! I have never had acupuncture done so I am excited to see what it is all about.
And really ... that is the extent of where I am at and what is going on. No headaches so far today ... which is a good thing. I was nervous to see how wearing more than one patch might affect me. I guess we will see what the rest of the week brings! All for good reason though. Headaches are pretty minor in the big picture!

Update: my Estradiol levels (what they were checking at the blood draw) came back at 57 and they wanted them above 50 - so we are on the right track!!!

patch 3

This morning I placed my 3rd patch (removing the previous each time). As with the last two I have noticed a headache a few hours after placing it. I think it is just a side effect at this point I am noticing - I was hesitant to call it that with the first patch but after 3 now it seems more than a coincidence. I have also noticed a little bit of a sore throat - which has gone away by the second day of wearing.
I wish I could blame being tired on it ... but being up at 1 and 4am the past two nights certainly has not helped my case in that area!

I am also starting to look at acupuncture and making an appointment. I would love to try and get a few sessions in prior to transfer (we still are going through legal and my mock, so that has not been set yet) just to make sure I have truly done everything I could on my end!

Sunday start

I officially placed my first patch today for the mock cycle. I am hoping I will not see many side effects from this. I do have a headache but I am not associating that with the patch just yet - seems a bit early! What I can assume is my headache is from working non-stop at my sewing machine the past two days getting Christmas dresses done for 2 of my kids. We go see our favorite Santa next week (I refuse to step foot in a mall after Thanksgiving!) so I wanted to have their dresses done. Maybe I can crank out two tunics for Thanksgiving since Christmas outfits are done so early! I am dying to try a new pattern. I might not have mentioned I love sewing - something about picking out fabrics, trims, the perfect pattern and watching it all come together with each stitch. And my kids love anything mama-made still so I am going to do this as long as they will let me!! Anyways - we will see if the headaches continue tomorrow!

So as I said in the start - I started the meds for my mock cycle today. Yay. I will have a blood draw on the 13th and an ultrasound and blood draw on the 21st to see how things are going! I am crossing my fingers that we will be in a good place after this first cycle and will not need to run a second to make any additional changes!

I am a part of a great group of surrogates and we have a group chat once a month. We just had our call this month and it was fun to see where everyone was at in their journey! Some pregnant and nearing the end, some just finished transfer, and some like me - are at the start! It is really nice to have that support though to go along with our other support systems!

Until next time!